Friday, October 24, 2008
Nattering Nabobs of Negativity Awards
The Committee for the Advancement of Delusion is proud to announce that this month’s Nattering Nabobs of Negativity Award goes to the two people who tried to blame the Island Trust for the 5 day phone outage. It is rare to see people so dedicated to the aim of being negative. These people actually tried to convince Islanders that the Island Trust somehow had the power to resolve the Telus labour dispute and to force other unions not to support the striking workers, but for some arcane reason, refused to use this power to get the phones working. Congratulations, you two have reached an all-time low in Trust Bashing – the interactive game that the whole family can play!
I have only a couple of questions for these intrepid artists of non-logical thinking.
– How stupid do you think your fellow Islanders are?
– Did you really think anyone would believe that the Trust had that power?
- Did you really think that this accusation would not affect your credibility?
Nominations are now open for the October awards. Anyone wishing to compete for this prestigious award should write to me directly. You must provide proof that you are truly dedicated to negativity and describe why your particular negative action, accusation or slander was completely inspired by your commitment to the Advancement of Negativity on Gabriola.
All submissions will be considered on their own merit with regards to viciousness, malice aforethought, and total disregard of reality. Originality will not be considered, so feel free to claim the negative actions of others as your own. All submissions must contain a self addressed and stamped envelope (although even the winners will not be contacted) and post-marked no later than the 21st of each month. All submissions must be accompanied by proof of identity as past contests have been marred by people trying to put the blame on others, or by people trying to take credit for the misdeeds of others.
Submit all entries directly to Ian Lowden. See small print for additional details of entry. There is, of course a fifty dollar handling fee (you didn’t really think I would wade thru buckets of bullcrap for free, did you?).
I have only a couple of questions for these intrepid artists of non-logical thinking.
– How stupid do you think your fellow Islanders are?
– Did you really think anyone would believe that the Trust had that power?
- Did you really think that this accusation would not affect your credibility?
Nominations are now open for the October awards. Anyone wishing to compete for this prestigious award should write to me directly. You must provide proof that you are truly dedicated to negativity and describe why your particular negative action, accusation or slander was completely inspired by your commitment to the Advancement of Negativity on Gabriola.
All submissions will be considered on their own merit with regards to viciousness, malice aforethought, and total disregard of reality. Originality will not be considered, so feel free to claim the negative actions of others as your own. All submissions must contain a self addressed and stamped envelope (although even the winners will not be contacted) and post-marked no later than the 21st of each month. All submissions must be accompanied by proof of identity as past contests have been marred by people trying to put the blame on others, or by people trying to take credit for the misdeeds of others.
Submit all entries directly to Ian Lowden. See small print for additional details of entry. There is, of course a fifty dollar handling fee (you didn’t really think I would wade thru buckets of bullcrap for free, did you?).
